Many Minds, One Home

I think it’s important to talk about how or why we landed on homeschooling as an alternative to public or private education. 

Homeschooling for us came as an answer to prayer.

We had our last baby in 2023 and by 2024 I found myself in a place and space I could have never expected. I was empty, surrounded by presence, but completely empty and overwhelmed inside. 

I think the hardest transition for me as a mom was going from one child to two. As a mother of one, I created a schedule and routine for me and my sweet boy. We were confident in our relationship and while I knew I wanted more kiddos, no one warned me about the fear, realistically, the guilt I would feel at the thought of interrupting that connection and adding another child to our lives. 

I remember being in active labor with my daughter and saying to my husband, how am I going to do this? Am I going to be enough to love another the way I love our boy???

But just as it did the first time, my heart instantly melted the minute I laid eyes on my girl; my fears slowed to a quiet stop; and my heart’s capacity grew. I fell in love all over again and fell into a new rhythm with my two babies before I knew it. 

The same happened when we welcomed our third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh child home. Our family grew and so did my capacity as their mom. 

It was really unexpected when I woke up one day early 2024 and realized I was miserable with the system and routine we had in place; shortly after I found myself having an absolute breakdown. 

We had gotten so structured, so organized, and so absolutely time limited with all the events, meets, and extra curricular activities for every child, that we unintentionally fell into a routine where I felt like all I was accomplishing in my motherhood was well balanced calendars, extreme busyness, and little to no time for intentional impact, deep conversation, or discovery of interests. 

We were just go, go, go, all the time. We had seven children in five different schools. A child with severe special needs, a child with a reading disability. Our five year old who was full of life and color was withdrawing in school, and our four year old was crying at drop off every morning. I was spending more time splitting myself into slivers to meet all the needs of every child, then actually enjoying them.

On the outside I was a well oiled machine, but on the inside, I was completely empty. When people would say “I don’t know how you do it,” it didn’t feel like a compliment as much as it did a giant red flag that I was on a dangerous path to complete and utter burn out. 

It was time for a shift. When our district notified us that they were redistricting and our girls would be pulled out of their school, I knew this was the change I had been praying for. Homeschooling came up in conversation and the nudge in my spirit knew to get started digging. After all, this craziness was not how I wanted to spend my motherhood. 

That was the beginning of my research on homeschooling. I had friends and acquaintances that I knew who were homeschooling, but I personally didn’t know enough to make a decision as to whether this was or was not for us. All I knew was the system we had in place was not working and we needed to undo it quickly. 

I read, Dumbing Us Down -The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling by John Taylor Gatto. 

I read Teaching from Rest: A Homeschooler’s Guide to Unshakable Peace by Sarah Mckenzie.

And I also read, Homeschooling for Absolute Beginners: Make Learning at Home Simple, Affordable, Fun, and Effective by Lorilee Lippincott. 

These read’s were enough! I quickly realized that what I desired most was to customize my motherhood. 

I wanted slower more peaceful mornings. Deeper more intentional conversations. I desired curiosity and to exploring new ideas and adventures with my kids that we didn’t normally have time for with our very strict routine.

Instead of asking them “what they learned today,” I wanted to be a part of it, and more then anything else I realized that I loved being with my kids and I was so sad they were spending more time away from me then with me. 

We have had the pleasure of meeting, knowing, and working with some pretty incredible teachers during our time in public school. Our decision to homeschool is less about public school and more about quality of life, quality time, flexibility, and the ability to show up how my children need me. 

They are all uniquely designed with different identities, gifts, ways of thinking and seeing the world. I am excited to have more time to learn how to best show up for my babies. 

So what will homeschooling look like for us? Well, it wont be school at home. We will not be focused on results and meeting expectations. Homeschooling for us will not be a competition to finish first, or to prove ourselves. We are undoing those mindsets. 

What I can confidently say is that we will be spending a lot more time as a family, picking different topics outside of our state mandated requirements to explore and adventure together. We will be celebrating each other’s different ways of thinking and being and encourage each other to try new things. 

I am excited about this journey and am thankful for all the friends we’ve met so far and will meet along the way to teach us new ways to learn and explore on the earth.